I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Randomize
