I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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