idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
