one might say we're banned from that church
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
