So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
