Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
