It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Randomize