I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I just gargled with NyQuil
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Randomize
