butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
