but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
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