Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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