There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
