As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
home. puking in laundry basket.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
