Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
