In the future we'll all be gay
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
