that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
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