you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Randomize
