So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
They are going to name an STD after you.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Randomize
