every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
thus making me awesome and them whores
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Randomize
