sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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