just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
