I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
