the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
