jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
