Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize