just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
