Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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