i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
