Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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