will power is for people who don't want to get laid
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
