Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
