I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I wish I only lived at night.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I have tasted many bathrooms
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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