Dual....:-)
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Randomize