at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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