It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
