don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize