I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
