She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
I see more hoeing in ur future
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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