You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
