This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Randomize
