it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
