so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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