I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
