i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
