i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
