Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Randomize
