You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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