Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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