did you get engaged???
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Randomize
