he shaved USA in his pubs
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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