Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
So much Jack, so little girl.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Randomize
