i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
